Fuck the patriarchy. (No, seriously.)

#TransparentTuesdays

Hi friend,

I just published the final module of my Fuck the Patriarchy patreon course, and I’m so excited to tell you about it today!

My inspiration for this self-study course came at the end of 2023, when I wrote a new mission statement for my business: to help people who have inadvertently taken on the job of their oppressors realize what’s happened, and break free.

I wanted to create a program for people who have 

Most of my audience is made up of folks who have already started the process of challenging, dismantling, and healing from the false and harmful messages taught to them by their oppressive social conditioning under patriarchy, so I knew I didn’t need to get them on board for their own empowerment or liberation, or introduce them to any basic concepts. But I wanted to create something for the folks who have been doing this work for a while, and are frustrated because they still struggle to take up space, cast off self-objectification, advocate for themselves, and step fully into their power. 

To be honest, I made this program because I was sick and tired of seeing women and femmes give up their agency, confidence, and peace of mind, in order to cater to the feelings, needs, egos, and preferences of men. I was sick and tired of seeing my amazing, intuitive, creative, intelligent, and badass clients work so hard to contort, control, repress, and shrink themselves, to achieve some arbitrary ideal, in the hopes that doing so will finally make them feel worthy. And I was sick and tired of seeing how striving to meet the “feminine ideal” makes a person more vulnerable to manipulation, coercion, exploitation, control, and abuse.

 Fuck the Patriarchy became my solution to all of this, and more:

• It’s my solution to the orgasm gap, and the fact that women in straight relationships have the least satisfying and orgasmic sex out of all demographics.

• It’s my solution to the fact that women in straight relationships still do a disproportionately higher amount of emotional, domestic, and care-taking labor than their male partners– even when they’re partnered with progressive men. 

• It’s my solution to how sexist positioning of women and femmes as “natural care-takers” makes them more vulnerable to sexual coercion, controlling partners, and domestic violence. 

• It’s my solution to the ubiquitous patterns of self-objectification, shame, hypervigilance, insecurity, and body image issues that disproportionately impact the confidence and mental health of women and femmes.

• It’s my solution to the issue of so many women being disconnected from, and distrusting of, the wisdom of their bodies and intuitions. 

• It’s my solution to the fact that so many women and femmes still struggle to speak up in the face of disrespect, hold people accountable for their behavior, set boundaries, advocate for their needs, put themselves first, and feel worthy.

This program is both a celebration of the innate power and worthiness of women and femmes, and a rage-fueled battle cry against the patriarchy… because the time has come that we are no longer going to participate in our own oppression. 

Things are changing, and not necessarily in the right direction. 

Our rights, autonomy, and humanity are up for debate and legislation (again). Politicians and public figures are way too comfortable making demeaning and objectifying comments about women, and we’ve gotten so used to learning that men in positions of power have a history of predatory sexual behavior that it no longer even feels newsworthy. And it’s becoming way too common to see people with huge platforms expressing regressive, gender-essentialist, and sexist views around women’s purpose, calling, and value as mothers, wives, and home-makers. 

I hate to say it, but I feel like if being nice, following the rules, and trying to appeal to men’s better nature was going to dismantle the patriarchy, it would have worked by now. So I think it’s time we try something… else.

I think it’s time we start breaking patriarchy’s rules– especially the rule that says we need to seek (or “earn”) the attention, approval, validation, or respect of men. 

As Assata Shakur wrote, “Nobody in the world, nobody in history, has ever gotten their freedom by appealing to the moral sense of the people who were oppressing them.”

If you’re ready to cast off self-objectification, decentralize the role of men’s feelings, needs, and preferences in your life, and reclaim your power, this self-study course is for you, and for the next two weeks I’m making it available for more than 50% off!

So right now, you can grab the whole course—including eight transformative modules of content (complete with pre-recorded webinars and worksheets packed with resources, journal questions, and practices) —for just $87!

If you’re curious what exactly you’ll learn on the journey to breaking free from internalized becoming harder to manipulate, exploit, and control, here’s a breakdown on the syllabus!

• Module 1: The Cult of Patriarchy & Internalized Oppression Learn how our internalized conditioning under patriarchy teaches us to actually control and oppress ourselves, using the same strategies we see playing out in cult psychology– and how to push back!

• Module 2: Sexism and Self-ObjectificationLearn the difference between oppositional and traditional sexism, and how to identify and dismantle your own internalized and oppressive beliefs around gender. 

• Module 3: Untangling Your Appearance From Your WorthBreak the association between your appearance and your value, by exploring your own authentic aesthetic preferences, and reconsidering the kind of person you’re striving to attract (and why). 

• Module 4: Reconnecting to Yourself & Your BodyUnderstand how being disconnected from ourselves makes us more vulnerable to exploitation and manipulation, and develop the skill of tuning into (and trusting) the wisdom of your body and intuition.

• Module 5: Building the Skills of Self-AdvocacyGet better at standing up for yourself, setting boundaries, speaking your truth, holding people accountable for their behavior, navigating conflict, and taking up space. 

• Module 6: Great Sex Under PatriarchyExplore how patriarchal messaging around sex, gender, pleasure, and worthiness make sex worse, and develop the skills needed to cultivate the healthy, fulfilling, pleasurable, and joyful sex life you desire. 

• Module 7: Great Relationships Under PatriarchyKick the patriarchy out of your romantic life, by learning strategies to make the dating process more enjoyable, empowering, and effective, as well as how to cultivate intimate relationships that feel healthy, authentic, fulfilling, and equitable. 

• Module 8: Resisting and Disrupting the Patriarchy Moving ForwardContinue identifying and dismantling the deep and sneaky layers of patriarchal conditioning that still make you feel insecure, anxious, or disempowered, and solidify your identity (and sense of belonging) as an active resistor and disruptor of patriarchy. 

If this feels like a good fit for you, I’ll be putting the course up on my website for $200 soon– but you can grab it grab it now (through Election Day!) for $87, by following The Link Here!

That’s it for today… thank you so much for being a part of the movement, wherever you happen to be on the journey!!

Big hug,

Jessi